Diecreation's Xanga

Voice

Sat, 27 Jun 2009 10:26:38 GMT

The Sun reminded me of humility

as it set on one side of my face, as i head onward with my script process.

My third person angle showed me, me, with shadowed slightly inset eyes,

staring on the floor as i walked forward

in the end everything is nothing but hardwork.

But there is a TWIST here. Right here right now.

For who told me all this?

I suddenly I realized that i did not know

which voice was Ding an and which voice was Diecreation.

Have we switched roles? or is there a third? A third that would make two whole again?

Sometimes in anguish, anxiety, wasteful worrying, we indulge into the darkness

we get tempted by sin, as they seem the easier way out of solutions when, there is none.

But when the dust settles, and always, when the dust settles,

we learnt that the easiest road to success is the longest.

The humility, whatever the case, being true to ourselves,

and keeping faith in the road of the simple traveller.

in retrospective, it is easy to blame the wild side, blame Diecreation for the chaos that he brings.

but then as i was walking the other day,

the voice came again.

This time, THIS VOICE spoke truth. I stood there debating with myself, and everything it said was right

"Humble. Simple approach to life, remember contentment? Remember the concept OF happiness equated to contentment. OF love - to synergy, understanding, soul-to soul conversation, of whispers without words?
These are the values you have always believed in, and in believing in them, has already rendered you,
The one who always so seeked to be unique, Unique." Said the voice.

And I heard this voice. This voice of conscience, that took a long holiday for so long, and I knew that it was right.

Perhaps it is beautiful. Maybe i am learning how to contain the chaos, whilst embarking on the road of the true.

I have seen the untrue of people. And felt how unhappy this life, of pretence, in order for a greater achievement
that in the end is rendered meaningless?

At this juncture, am i right? Are there no grey areas in truth? That people can do certain things to force an outcome?

And yet, the true conscience inside me says, "The answer is absolutely. you can see it, you know it, you are actually not confused, you know full well of fakeness, trickery, sin, that these things once employed, will also render your ultimate goal, as empty as your methods. Thus making victory fake. Trust in your instincts, your truth, your honest road, and your outcomes will also come honest."

There it is again, it just typed it. Did you see it?

Sigh out....

Man, i am strange.

Diecreation longest return

Fri, 05 Sep 2008 06:10:51 GMT

Diecreation's journal 5th September 2008
__________________________________

Yes i was little bit away, too far, yet too near,

and for the longest time,
watching Ding An
dedicate his life to something and throwing everything else out the window, any emotion, any petty thing, any hate, love, friendship, he had, he threw out, to make his film work...

And,
Through fogged up glass, air con Orchard cineleisure shopping mall lobby, a heavy rain outside ouring,
I see him
standing there,
in front of 1000s of people walking by,
finally facing up to the reasons why his Passion n Sacrifice could not be justified.

Someone did,
someone, a Miss niceheart,
counselled him with a,
"do u want 100 people to see and say they love your film, or do u want thousands to watch it and say it sux."

Sometimes people with nice hearts, have really tricky questions...plunging the poor confused Ding into a deeper sea, with stranger n uglier sea creatures not yet discovered.

So I decided Ding An is not very capable of handling the situation,
always nice n soft the way he is,
and quiet,
and evasive to his environment,
and a visionary that is afraid of stepping on a single housefly to inflict
the true change the world needs.

Diecreation is different.

And so here I am once more, whilst Director Ding an lays in the ashes, sleeping with the fishes, trying to sum up a new energy once more from his endless bowls of instant noodles, i am here.

Day by day i find myself becoming more like Rorschach, of me long awaited WATCHMEN movie, constantly feeling that the world is in decay, and yet insisting on saving it, (or not) - i like his game of choice(3rd person perspective), just like the youth of today have that choice.

(cracks fingers)

OK OK

So shall we get started?

Sincerely sincerely,
Diecreation
"Live a Creation, Die a cReation"

Strange fella this...

This is Sparta

Mon, 16 Jul 2007 21:36:59 GMT

Got the 300 DVD.

If Transformers was a movie that i can say was my MOVIE of the year.

300 was a movie of my life.

Yes. 300 came out on DVD, both my brother and me rushed to buy it. Not for the Violenece, so please listen, FOR THE its passion for defining what makes a real Man.

The strength of the human race. the power of a person's determination has always championed my deepest of desires.

Leonidas, the king of Sparta, the name itself implying, born of Lion Breed.

Look at their training. The heartlessness of discarding an imperfect child, the 7 year old commando style training where not everyone makes it alive after being dumped in the jungle with wolves.

BUT

To say that their sacrifice makes them cold, to say that they are not of loving race, are only words of a fool.

They die, they bleed for a greater cause,

1) to be the BEST that the human condition can be - Look at their bodies - Ridiculously strong.

2)In order to protect the ones they love, so much so that the wife of the king can tell him, "come back with your shield or on it"

Personally this transcends the uselessness of petty love and lust.

It makes the heartbreak n sadness of all other things turn into dust.

I draw strength from this film. To be the best that i can possibly be, not for me, but for all around me, before my life is up.

And I urge all my friends, and anyone reading this now. To understand that to dwell in darkness or unhappiness will only attract more unhappiness. To dwell in Work, is only an excuse for hating Love.

Dwell in Purpose. Dwell with a smile on your face, the calmness and aloofness of ronaldinho dancing past an opponent just because he loves football. Dwell in the happiness of Dashing towards finding your own definition of what is the BEST of you. Dwell but never let a sad thought enter. Never a dark past revisited. Keep moving forward with that BRAVE smile on your face that the world is not working for you, but YOU can make it work for you

Dwell in happiness in order to finally find it.

especially you.

Sincerely

DIng An Films

Racing to my wife

Sat, 07 Jul 2007 15:13:47 GMT

Wedding of a close friend

It's been a while since i blogged or did wedding videos. A very good friend who once rescued me out of loneliness requested, so i helped him. Eternal blessings Alvin.

I always learn from Weddings.
1st question is always how they met.
2nd is always What does a man have to be like to find someone worthy?

To be truly honest, i know that i have never had even a single meaningful relationship before. I would eventually be loyal to her. I know. But she is so hard to find as it seems the world just does not have someone that expresses a mutual interest.

Simple criteria: 2 people who are interested and wanna start something.

my friend....my age....MARRIED ! and i am here, not having had 1 single taste of what love even is?

WINDOW SHOPPING PRISON:
_________
i am in a prison, and there are window shoppers looking at me. I am smiling as hard as i can, as if selling myself short.

But no matter how hard i smile or dont smile, improve myself or not. No one tries to even open the door. Yes, some have tried, but i guess things work by a simple law - the feeling must be mutual, or else it will never be eternal anyway. I understand this more these days. I walk away faster than in the past.

____________

But after 24 hours of bashing myself up, i recovered. I always had that self healing powers of Wolverine. Really fast. Though i hate it, cos it means no one needs to heal me so they can just discard me. It saves me i admit.

i decided.

:) to smile.
And be patient just for a longer while

Nothing is more important than getting my impossible but Life changing film, made.
Nothing is more important than releasing my book.

So i say this to you. My wife in the future whom i have not yet met.

I have dropped all childish things

and AM racing towards you now.

Wait for me

sincerely
Ding AN

Roar of Lions

Thu, 07 Jun 2007 14:49:38 GMT

:)

How long ago did i set out to be a film maker?
I was also a musician. A game designer. A story writer...

Like the sands of time in a cruel hour glass, the sands did not stop dripping away.

Everyday that i tried to become a film maker, i fell sideways, got distracted.
I was attacked from every possible angle:
physical,
my own variance of abilities: being able to do tooooo many things without focus..
work, endless pursuit of moeny
people telling u , u'll neve rmake it,
and even emotional temptations - a shot at love none eternal -

These days i hang a cheap T-shirt i bought from Bugis....it has a beautiful picture of a LION on it.

Actually, not this one. this one is more proud. The Lion T shirt i got, he is focused. His eyes transfixed upon the glancer of the t-shirt. He never loses focus... i like that

Every morning, I stare into the Lion's eyes
trying to find myself inside his courage.
Encouraging myself to never to give up.
I will get this film done...

And i will...

The best way to talk about time is.

I succeed Today. not tomorrow. Today.

Sincerely
Diecreation

Road to the greatest film maker who ever lived...

Love Song for Mother

Tue, 15 May 2007 08:55:31 GMT

Woo

i got featured on Youth.sg

http://youth.sg/blog/2007/05/13/happy-mothers-day-2007/

playing a song on piano and singing ...well not so welly.... but its the thought that counts lah

haha

enjoy

Sincerely
D

i got inspired just by looking at someone...which made me write

"Passion is a drip of ice,

Hardwork is its saturation

never giving up is the crystalization..."

:)

Road to K

Fri, 20 Apr 2007 05:13:10 GMT

My journey is taking me places..

it is as if i am revisiting something deep within my heart

my journey is about a man

finding back the true meaning of football

i will succeed

DIECREATION EXODUS

Sat, 17 Mar 2007 14:24:18 GMT

E X O D U S

Diecreation Vs the Armandillos

Mon, 26 Feb 2007 08:08:11 GMT

Previously on DIECREATION______
"Ever since Diecreation decided to take a holiday into the integrated resort known as oblivion, Ding an had been left to cope with and handle things...Diecreation suddenly had a sixth sense telling him he was needed once more, and he came back from the paradise of paradises to come affirm his intuition once more."..........................

Diecreation slugged his luggage over his shoulder and kicked open the front door of Ding An's house.

"Oi! i am home. i was just enjoying my Singapore slings and sand when i had this intuition to return. So whats this all about.....?"

Diecreation stopped talking. this was because he was talking to Ding An, but Ding an was not there. in place of where ding an should be, was an armandillos.

Diecreation walked over and kicked the armandillos. The armandillos fell over sideways but felt no pain whatsoever from the armour surrounding its body.

Diecreation removed his ridiculous sunglasses and hawaiin shirt.

"haiz. just a few months, i leave u and u become like that! haiz... What happened."

The armandillos kept quiet like all good armandillosses known to man would.

"Knowing you, you won't tell anybody anyway. Not even your best friends."

The armandillos kept quiet. It nodded. Its armour was becoming titanium by now.

"Hey! Snap out of it!" shouted Diecreation. Diecreation shaped his hand into a sharp liquid metal that solidified into a needle and attempted the armor of the Armandillos. (T-1000)

but the armor stayed firm and Diecreation broke his hand.

Diecreation walked away. he strutted around the room finding a solution

"an armadillos that wont talk about its pain. Forming a hard shell to shield itself from the world. An internal escapism. haven't we all seen this b4 somewhere? Hoi! DING AN! Get out of there! NOW!"

The armandillos shook its head.

"Get out of there now!"

Anger did not work against a shell. The titanium armor slowly turned into admantium, unbreakable.

"Alright, care to share what happened?"

The armandillos wont say

"If u wont say, and u want to be like this? What do u expect me to do?"

The armandillos did nothing.

"ok! Come on! we are buddies, being your alter ego and all, can't you at least give me a hint?"

The armandillos was tired. Tired pretending he did not want others to know. he pointed to a picture on the wall.

This was the picture.

Diecreation slapped his own face.

"AIhhh....not again." Diecreation folded his sleeves and sat down.

The two sat and stared for 24 hours without saying a word. The armandillos was thinking and so was Diecreation. both sat and stared, thinking but not saying a word.

After the 25the hour. A len flare crept into the corner of Diecreation's eye. He knew it was time.

The armandillos slowly reduced its armor. Slowly Ding an returned.

Ding An sat there dazed but confident. Diecreation looked at him and smiled.

Ding An smiled back.

"I never had to say a word right?" asked Diecreation

Ding An shook his head.

"You have become stronger. Just like Naruto."

Ding An nodded his head.

"Just a reminder, in case u forget.." said Diecreation as made himself at home.

Ding An looked at Diecreation, wondering what he would say

"The answer to your woes isn't pessimism, hate, agony, pain, and closing the doors to your heart."
"The solution of your problems isn't blind faith, lust, senseless, hope, impatience and running into another brick wall"
"If you dare blame yourself, then you have matured."
"And after u do, forgive yourself and all around you, and this world you once hated."
"And after that smile.
"And never frown again.
"And never say that this world never gave u a chance
"And never say there was never any hope in the first place.
"and never say it will always be..."

Diecreation placed his lips near a glass of red wine. He had that cocky over over over confident smile in his lips. He smiled and tasted the very first virgin sip of the MArtini and said.

"Not even a centimetre of doubt should you have in this world, those around you and especially YOURSELF"

Diecreation looked around the room.

Ding an had disappeared. he was nowhere to be found.

Diecreation jerked his neck abruptly as if just experiencing a tickle.

He lowered his head and then raised it again.

His voice was that of Ding An's as he spoke.

"I know." smiled Diecreation as he finished the glass of red wine.

sincerely
Diecreation Ding An

Arnold was right

Thu, 22 Feb 2007 11:39:38 GMT

Arnold is right.

He visualized what he wanted to become everyday. He had a mental picture of what he wanted and where he would go.
I like his one saying

"The human body was never desgined for a sedantry lifestyle, it was created to hunt sabretooth tigers and wa;l forty miles a day"

I want to be a a fit, strong, goodlooking and self confident succesful film maker.

The strongest muscle is the mind

and the greatest charm is self confidence. It was never the case that i did not possess it, but always that FEAR of offending someone weaker or losing friends made me take a step back.

But recent events have taught me good lessons in life

If you are not going to stand up to take what u want, then you just become an eternally unfufilled storyline.

I cannot go there. My drive is ready.

I am Diecreation the Film maker, and i take what i want.

I will harvest the confidence to melt mountains...

You should too

Sincerley
D